Fox News Host Eric Bolling

Eric Bolling: The Fox News Host Who's More Colorful Than a Rainbow After a Few Too Many

Alright, gather 'round, folks. I've got a tale to tell about a man who's as colorful as a Fox News screen during election night, and that's saying something. I'm talking about none other than Eric Bolling, the host who's been making waves and raising eyebrows for years now.

Now, Eric's not your average Joe. He's a former commodities trader turned TV personality, which is like going from being a Wall Street wolf to a Hollywood hound. I mean, can you imagine him in a suit, barking into a phone, "Sell! Sell! Sell!" and then, boom, he's on TV, barking into a microphone, "You know what, liberals? You're wrong! And here's why..."

From Commodities to Controversies

Eric's journey from the trading floor to the TV screen is as surprising as finding a snowman in the Sahara. He started his career as a commodities trader, which, for those of you who don't speak 'Wall Street,' means he was buying and selling things like oil, gold, and even pork bellies. Yes, you read that right. Pork bellies. I mean, who knew there was a market for that?

But Eric wasn't content with just making a killing in the markets. Oh no, he had to go and get himself a TV show. And not just any show, mind you. He joined Fox News, the network that's about as subtle as a sledgehammer. And that's where the real fun began.

Bolling the Boat

Eric's time at Fox News was... eventful. He hosted shows like "Cashin' In" and "The Five," where he'd sit around a table with other Fox News personalities, and they'd all take turns trying to out-shock each other. It was like a game of chicken, but with words instead of cars.

And boy, did Eric have some doozies. He's compared Obama to a 'skinny, gay' version of the Incredible Hulk. He's said that Democrats have 'cojones the size of a peanut.' And he's even suggested that Hillary Clinton has a 'special relationship' with the FBI director. I mean, where do you even start with that one?

But Eric wasn't just all talk. Oh no, he walked the walk too. Remember that time he was suspended for sending lewd photos to colleagues? Yeah, that was a thing. It was like a real-life episode of 'The Office,' but with less Michael Scott and more... well, you know.

Bolling Over to Other Networks

After his suspension, Eric left Fox News and joined CRTV, a network that's about as mainstream as a punk rock concert. He hosted a show called "America This Week," where he'd rant and rave about all the things that were wrong with the world. It was like watching a real-life version of the 'Angry Birds' game, but with more swearing and less cartoon pigs.

Eric Bolling Photos and Premium High Res Pictures - Getty Images

But Eric's time at CRTV was short-lived. The network shut down, and Eric was left without a TV home. It was like watching a puppy lose its favorite chew toy. But don't worry, Eric didn't stay unemployed for long. He joined Sinclair Broadcast Group, a company that owns a bunch of local TV stations. And that's where he is now, still barking into microphones and making waves.

Bolling Down the Aisles

Now, you might be thinking, "Wow, Eric Bolling sure has a colorful past. But what's he like in person?" Well, let me tell you, folks, Eric is as warm and welcoming as a campfire on a cold winter's night. He's been known to greet guests with a hearty handshake and a smile that's as bright as a neon sign. And he's always ready with a joke or a laugh, even when the cameras are rolling.

But don't let that charm fool you. Eric's a tough cookie. He's been through more controversies than a Kardashian sister, and he's still standing. He's like the Energizer Bunny of politics, just keep going and going and going.

So there you have it, folks. The story of Eric Bolling, the Fox News host who's more colorful than a rainbow after a few too many. He's a character, that's for sure. And whether you love him or hate him, you've got to admit, he's never boring.

Until next time, folks. Keep your eyes on the news, and your ears open for the next big story. And remember, if it's too hot in the kitchen, don't blame the chef. Or something like that.